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Post by Joecool on Sept 7, 2018 8:25:31 GMT -6
I am asking for prayer. I am struggling with multiple addictions, depression, and severe case of insomnia for the past few weeks. Idk if the addictions are causing the depression or insomnia or vice versa. I think i am stuck in a vicious cycle. I notice on the rare occasions I get a decent nights sleep I can fight both depression and the addictions much easier. As I work a full time job while going to school I need my sleep. I try to schedule 7-8 sleep/night but usually only get 3-4 if that. I want to go to a sleep doctor, but first I have to finish paying off the chiropractor's bills from when I messed up my back.
This morning was really really bad. It was like all my hope was gone and overwhelming lonely darkness was all I had. I am having trouble keeping it together at work, since everything seems to be going wrong today. It is like I am wearing a mask at work/home where everyone thinks i am all good, but really inside I am broken. I am trying not to give up, but I am so tired of fighting. Why does everyday have to be a fight and why are there seemingly more bad days than good ones?
Yet despite all this I know deep down that God will bring me through as He always does. It is by His grace alone that I didn't run my car into the big tree near my house this morning or any of the other times I thought about it.
I guess I am just asking for peace and strength to overcome the struggles. I have also been asking God to send someone to connect with face to face. I don't feel like I can trust anyone around me at the moment.
I think God is working on my pride too, because asking for help (writing this post) was/is difficult for me.
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Post by mike on Sept 7, 2018 12:44:29 GMT -6
Prayer your direction brother!
Lord we pray in agreement today for our brother, your beloved son and friend for peace and joy is his heart as well as rest for soul and physical body.
Let him hear your voice clearly as well
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Post by stormyknight on Sept 7, 2018 12:48:58 GMT -6
Prayers are up for you, brother. Boy, can I identify with your post! Hang in there and stay strong. I get the feeling it won't be very much longer. As for the addictions, what helped me was picturing that I was a janitor for God's temple(your body) and I had to sweep out all the dirt and trash(addiction), not forgetting the corners and cobwebs. It made it easier to not trash it up again. It still happened, but with less frequency until I had overcome that particular issue. Dealing with people who are 'not in the know', who can sometimes be downright horrible, is harder for me, but I try to give that to Jesus to deal with. For years before I knew about the Rev. 12 sign and just how close we are to leaving, I prayed for God to send me an angel or messenger to just come and have coffee with me. It never happened(that I'm aware of), but I've grown closer by prayer and reading, so it's all good. Remember, "For you are all sons of the light and sons of the day; we do not belong to the night or to the darkness." 1 Thess. 5:5. That darkness you feel has no power over you, you just need to keep coming back to the path toward Jesus and you'll be OK. He is always with us.
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Post by nana on Sept 7, 2018 14:02:29 GMT -6
Sure will
Remember, ...with God all things are possible...
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Post by barb84 on Sept 7, 2018 14:27:27 GMT -6
Praying for you!
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Post by Gary on Sept 7, 2018 22:31:28 GMT -6
I'll echo what Mike said. You're OUR BROTHER and you're a BELOVED SON of the King. In the darkest times I have to remember my identity. Like you, I have struggled with deep despair. But don't forget who you are to God and who you are to your brothers and sisters in Christ, many of whom are struggling as you are. Every day of perseverance makes your testimony that much grander and when you share it as you have today, it helps others of us who are struggling to bear up under the pressure.
Think on good things.
Thing on Christ.
Think on the nearness of our redemption, rapture, and glorification.
We will be in Heaven soon and these light, momentary afflictions are worth it.
You are loved and many prayers are headed your way.
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Post by boraddict on Sept 7, 2018 23:45:04 GMT -6
Joecool, you are not alone. My son suffers from a similar situation in addition to being autistic (high functioning) and at times dishonest. He turns 22 next week and wants his drivers license back after driving to DC last year and loosing the car in a rainstorm. Then he was homeless in DC with no money nor anyway to contact me since his phone was ruined in the rain. What a nightmare that was. I convinced a mental health hospital in which the police had taken him to drive him to the airport. Since he was just autistic they could not keep him past observation of just a few hours. I arranged for a friend to get him in Detroit and then drove there to pick him up. From the west that is, and I drove there in 23 hours non stop beginning in the late afternoon with no sleep from the night before. Not only that, but my cell phone had no contact west of North Plat Nebraska as he was boarding the plane in DC. I did not know if he made the plane or not and if not then he was lost in DC. Now that could be a movie to watch.
So Joe, you are not alone. Many of us know very well your plight. Please be at peace knowing that we love you and you are in our prayers. Stay strong for us. We are your friends who love you. Be strong. I love you.
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Post by Joecool on Sept 10, 2018 9:47:03 GMT -6
Thank You all for the prayers and the words of encouragement
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