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Post by galen on Jan 4, 2018 22:11:40 GMT -6
I have put too much hope in dates and with everything coming and going I feel overwhelmed. I want to feel hopeful that we are going home soon (intellectually I still feel very sure of it but emotionally I feel drained and empty) but more importantly I want to be able to use whatever time I have left to reach out to those around me. I am surrounded by professing Christians including my family who dismiss any end times talk as lunacy and I feel powerless in reaching out to them. Generally they don't seem to believe in the tribulation, let alone the rapture. The church I have been part of for years preaches that we must somehow usher in the kingdom by making the world more like heaven, a couple of years ago a series was preached in Revelation that allegorized everything to meaningless and concluded the book was all about "hope for the persecuted Church" that I am sure would have John tearing his hair out. They are also very "progressive" and ecumenical with a deep reverence for the Catholic church (recently the pastor referred to the reformation as a "tragedy that split the church" they want to see a united church and will definitely be suckers for the one world religion). Israel and Trump are also considered to be villians. I have been with this church for about 15 years, had a few reservations at the start but was generally happing, I believe God has gradually revealed to me how lost they actually are over the past 3 years or so. Superficially they look very good and they do a lot of service in the community and believe in reaching the world with the Gospel as they understand it I would like to find another church but I don't see a lot of point. I'm not aware of any solid churches in my area (in New Zealand, city interstingly named Christchurch). Also I am not in a strong financial situation and relying on living in a flat with fellow people from my church at a low rent who know nothing of what I believe and would be shocked to know just how disillusioned I am with the church. I tried to bring up some end time stuff with my family a couple of years ago (which was ill-advised as I was only just getting into the end time stuff and they thought it was confirmation that my mental illness of some years ago was coming back particularly when I tried to point out how the Democrats were ruining America. Didn't even get on to Pope Francis and I ended up thoroughly humiliated and have had to lay low and learn stuff since). I am psyching myself to send out a message to them pointing out that I have been carrying down the same road (they think I'm doing much better) and that I believe the rapture is very soon and they will miss it. I haven't even had the courage to point out to them that I believe they're unsaved. Questions include how much scriptural argument and other evidence I should try and present, if it's too long they won't read it or should I just give the facts and resign to not convincing them of anything this side of the rapture but possibly ready their hearts so they may see what's happened once I'm gone. I really think that anyone who still thinks that things are relatively normal will continue to be deaf to all the alarms until the rapture or think that all our current issues can be solved by getting rid of Trump, accepting anyone except "hateful intolerant Christians" and working together towards the popular delusions of world peace, fixing the enviromental crisis and socialist utopian ideals.
Anyway I am feeling very depressed about my failure to witness and at times even suicidal. I don't want to be a part of this world anymore where hardly anyone has a clue and they all ridicule those that do. I still have certain moral failings so if I start getting to judgemental about the world it turns into feeling guilty about myself which weakens my "coming out" resolutions. I want to find a job having had a difficult employment history due to mental illness a decade ago and then study. I am currently 35 with limited employment history. If anyone wants further details about my situation for better informed prayer or to offer advice you can PM me. There's no one I know who I feel I can confide in or seek out advice, they're not on the same page even though I believe some of them are genuine Christians. I do wonder about trusting God to find me a job and then moving out somewhere a safe distance away from those I'm trying to reach so I can send them messages without depending on them for anything. If the rapture happens today I believe there's enough so that what God has laid on my heart hasn't gone to waste as I have prepared written material and have several relevant books waiting to be divinely discovered, part of me wonders if I should just leave it at that and sit tight. If anyone knows of anyone online who could give me better advice than anyone here please mention it.
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Post by barbiosheepgirl on Jan 4, 2018 23:05:47 GMT -6
dearest galen...I get on the verge of tears when I read this message of yours here. PLease if I can encourage you at all, download the pdf of the Restoration thread I think @silentknight would be more than happy to private massage you directly with this. All I can do is pray that you will be overcome with a new hope for all those that you worry for, that are your stumbling blocks or give you grief. Read with a prayerful heart what he is presenting. It is a long study, but you could very well be enlightened and have a renewed hope. This Restoration lesson will lead to his latest Kingdom of God thread.
I used to be so concerned about the counting of days, or patterns and all that.. I know they are significant and have meaning but for some reason they no longer are my focus. One thing that silentknight said in one of these 2 threads that got me to think and pray was "what if we have the rapture season correct, but the tribulation timeline wrong?" I am paraphrasing. Point being his teachings have been very helpful (at least to me) to gain a true understanding of God's Plan for the upcoming Barley harvest, the healing of nations and the conquering of Death and putting all things into submission under Christ... oh how wonderful a plan he has to undo what Adam did. But it is a timing thing, brother galen. Rest in Him so as to Hear Him. Take a deep, long inhale of Faith! That is all we are required to do...
things will be happening very soon!
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Post by cwood85 on Jan 4, 2018 23:18:46 GMT -6
I am praying for you Galen. Let God handle this with His peace and love ❤️
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Post by grandpaskitzo on Jan 4, 2018 23:33:25 GMT -6
First off Galen, I liked your post because I was feeling a lot like you not too long ago, and I want you to know I’m praying for you. If it weren’t for the one close friend I do have and my fiancé, Id probably feel as alone as you do, but remember we are not alone. God has put you there in that place for a reason, and it will glorify Him. Hold on tight brother! Things are very soon about to shake on this earth and those that love God are going to witness the most amazing things. God has been telling me patience for sooo many years now, and each time I was feeling down and tired and beaten, but He reminds us that His coming is soon and all of our tears will be wiped away.
I know how you feel about feeling like a failure to witness, and man does that hurt sometimes. I’ve beaten myself up over that way too much, but then I’m reminded that we can’t see what’s really transpiring in peoples hearts and souls. Some plant seeds, some water, and some harvest, and some all the work in between, it’s what makes us the body of Christ, we are all different members with our own gifts, talents, purposes, etc. Stay strong and know that you are not alone or useless. If you’re still alive, it’s because God IS using you and DOES have a purpose for you. Just rest and trust in Him.
Idk how cell service works for long distance, but I would gladly talk with you on the phone or email or text. I’ve been praying so hard lately that God would put more people in my path that share the same open sight for the world and understand the time we’re truly in.
Also, I fully agree with barbiosheepgirl. Check out the restoration threads and keep in prayer when studying them. It has drastically helped my perspective and even moreso increased my faith.
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Post by BSG-Mom on Jan 5, 2018 0:16:20 GMT -6
Galen,
We are or have all been where you are. I have found in my walk with the Lord to admit and confess fear, loneliness, anxiety, and anger, and then praise Him. Somewhere in the Bible we are told to "put on a garment of praise for a spirit of heaviness." I just stop and praise Him in spite of my circumstances. You may not feel anything in the beginning, but I can assure you that your burden will be lifted.
The enemy of your soul wants you discouraged and feeling worthless--that's his favorite weapon.
I am praying for you.
BSG-Mom
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Post by sawdy on Jan 5, 2018 1:28:39 GMT -6
galenThe first step is to reach out and tell somebody when you are feeling depressed. You have done that by posting here. I can't think of a better place to post than in this forum of people who have either been where you are mentally, spiritually or even physically. You feel like you are unable to witness to others. I feel that I need to remind you that what we post here isn't private. Others do see it and perhaps your story will be one to encourage someone else. Stay strong and put on your armour of God. Many of us have strained relationships in our families and sometimes also in our churches and workplaces. Currently, I am the only one in my family who follows pretrib (or any trib for that matter). I have a husband that doesn't see eye to eye with me on matters such as watching Harry Potter. I am employed by my church and struggle with being an encouragement to others when I feel like there is an elephant in the room. I feel fake talking about long term plans, planning for my kids college in more than 10 years and talking about those plans regularly. But try as I may, I can't seem to be a witness to others that aren't attending Church. I can't seem to make inroads with my secular friends and family and can't make inroads with my church going family and church family into discussions of any scripture of any type. Unless it is on topic as part of a Bible study it isn't discussed. The sermons aren't even reflected upon. So what I am trying to say is that we all have struggles and we need to take them to Jesus. He is our light in the darkness. He will never leave you nor forsake you. Remember that. Try and work on one issue at a time. Right now your biggest concern appears to be employment, followed by rental situation? I know the other things that are going on seem to feel just as important but what you need to do is focus on the most important issue first. God will help you though your situation. Trying to do too much at once will cause your family concern for you mental status. Keep going to church but seek out some online preachers and spend time in the word yourself. Keep on being a pleasant flat mate as perhaps in time, God will open up an opportunity there; his timing is not necessarily our timing. God bless and I am praying for you.
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Post by mike on Jan 5, 2018 7:55:19 GMT -6
Galen - I would echo what everyone above said. I will pray for you and offer please PM me anytime you need to vent, cry, talk or whatever. As I was expressing my requests to ask God to forgive me for "letting the Him down" my spirit was quickened in that I "heard" - "if you succeed every time would you remain humble or feel as if you accomplished something". Personally I need to be reminded of this so that I dont feel as if I did anything and can rest. Every day is a new day, your day is about to end, let tomorrow be the start of something. Our Lord will be returning soon, we know it...Hold on to HIM not a date or event.
Mike
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Post by Deleted on Jan 5, 2018 9:18:25 GMT -6
galen , I will add you to the list of those to whom I am committed in prayer. I will also offer this - Do not worry about the spiritual condition or education of those in your life. Instead, focus on your relationship with them. Love them. Right or wrong. Blind or deaf. Informed or ignorant. None of that matters. Whatever truth you could teach them would contain, within itself, its own lies or mistakes. Leave these things up to the Lord - Trust Him to do His job. He will take care of their spiritual condition. He will bring them home. He will ensure that they see what they are supposed to see. For you, just love those around you. Be with them. Listen to them talk about their life, their concerns, their fears and hopes. Be present for them. Pray for them. Treat them as if they are Christ. Serve them. When I say serve, I don't mean "obey." I mean treat them as though you are their host and they are your guest. Wherever you are. The best witness you can be is to allow them to see Christ in you. And all the preaching or teaching you can manifest is negated, in the mind of others, by a single harsh word or errant act. Your job, right now, should you choose to accept it - is to love them and let go of the technicalities. Rest in God for everything else. This will impact them over time - and it will cure many of your ills as well.
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Post by butterfly5777 on Jan 6, 2018 15:00:55 GMT -6
Hi Galen,
I just read your post and wanted to write to let you know my heart goes out to you. We know how you feel, brother! We're right there with you! I just got a call from a friend from church who basically said the same thing you've said - "I'm weary. Worn out. Wanting the rapture to come. Can't figure it out anymore. Homesick. Where is Jesus???" My answer: Closer than we think. Right at the Door! Literally! There are just too many signs that can't be ignored! And, ok, our dates wrong in big ways and small, but we can't negate the fact that we are moving closer to His Soon Return! So, hold on, brother! Remember we have CROWNS waiting for us!!! And a glorious testimony that we BEAT DEATH!!!! Don't throw in the towel now! Don't give up the fight! You're not alone! We're all standing right next to you in faith!!! We are on this long, steep, narrow hike, where the oxygen is getting thin... exhausted, worn out, tired, and weary... following the Master to the pinnacle! YOU CAN DO IT! AND HE WILL DO IT THROUGH YOU! WHEN YOU ARE WEAK, HE IS STRONG! LET HIM CARRY YOU.
You know, I was lamenting the other day about the majority of my family who have practically shunned me because I am a born-again Christian, refuse to live in sin, have warned them about the rapture, and have been mocked for it repeatedly - and while praying for them AGAIN and begging God to save them - I heard Him say this: "Do not sorrow. I give every man a chance to follow Me." I don't know about you, but this gave me great peace. The fact is He cares more about our family members than we do. It may be that you are not the person He will use to save them. That's ok. Remember, God is sovereign. He does not want anyone to perish. Perhaps the best way for you to lead them to Christ is to simply pray for them - for their salvation, for their eyes and ears to be open to truth, for their hearts to be softened, and for their necks to turn in His direction. Sometimes that's all we can do.
If you feel that depression, or issues from the past, are beginning to try to get a foothold in your life again, reach out and talk with someone. There's no shame in that. Let the light in. Sometimes just venting our frustrations can be a big relief and help empty out the heavy backpack we're carrying. We need to travel light.... we're just passing through.
KNOW THIS ABOVE AND BEYOND: GOD LOVES YOU! HE'S GOT YOU CARVED ON THE PALM OF HIS HANDS. HE WILL NEVER LEAVE YOU OR FORSAKE YOU. YOU MEAN EVERYTHING TO HIM. HE IS WITH YOU WHERE EVER YOU GO. HE IS COMING FOR YOU. HIS ARMS ARE OPEN. HE'S CALLING YOUR NAME. HE HAS A PLACE PREPARED FOR YOU. YOU WILL RULE & REIGN WITH HIM FOR ALL ETERNITY! REST IN THIS TRUTH!
Keep up the GOOD FIGHT! Remember, we are in this battle with you.... and SPOILER ALERT: WE WIN!!!!!!!!! : ))
Check out these songs on YouTube:
Mercy Me
1) Even If
2) We Win
3) Grace Got You
4) Happy Dance
Praying for you! God bless!
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